Invitation Guide
You can keep wording classic and traditional or be more creative and fun, it is up to you! Wedding invitation etiquette rules aren’t that complicated, they are much simpler and straightforward than you think and of course they’re there to serve as a guideline. The most important things is that have a beautiful wedding invitation that represents you, your love and the big day to come and communicates the vital details of the wedding.
All wedding invitations should include the following elements:
- Who’s hosting
- The names of the couple to be married
- The time and date
- The location of the ceremony
- Reception information
- Drerss code
- RSVP Date and to whom
Invitation wording step-by-step
The Host Line: Who’s Hosting
Traditionally, the bride’s parents are the hosts of the wedding, and are named at the top of the invitation. However, including the names of both sets of parents as hosts is a gracious option no matter who foots the bill. Also, more and more couples these days are hosting their own weddings, or do so together with their parents.
If it’s a collaborative affair hosted and paid for by the bride, groom and both sets of parents, you can also use “Together with their parents, Joanna and Mark request the pleasure of your company …”
What If Any Parents are Deceased
To include a deceased parent just means rearranging the wording a bit. Try this, for example:
Joanna Ley, daughter of the late Mr. John Ley and Jacqueline Ley,
and
Mark Broadhurst, son of Mr. Roy and Jennifer Broadhurst,
request the honor of your presence…
What to Do If Any Parents are Divorced and/or Remarried
If the bride or groom’s parents are divorced and you want to include both as hosts, you can include them all, just keep your each parent on a separate line. If you’re going to include the name of stepparent, keep it on the same line.
This is an example of a bride with divorced (and remarried) parents’ wedding invitation wording:
Dr. Alex and Suzanna Williams
and Mr. James Tustin and Chloe Tustin
and Mr. Roger & Chris Lymath
invite you the wedding of their children
Gemma Lymath and Aaron Tustin
Addressing Envelopes
There are a few simple guidelines to follow when it comes to addressing a wedding invitation, whether it’s a bid to a formal affair or to a backyard bash. Traditionally, the inner and outer envelopes follow different etiquette rules. The outer envelope should be formal—our favorite option for this is to write out the recipient’s or both recipients’ full name(s), including their personal title(s). This format is foolproof, since it works for couples of all genders who may or may not share a surname, yet still feels somewhat traditional.
Though, if you feel personal titles might feel restrictive and exclusive for your guests list (especially if some don’t identify as Mrs., Ms., Miss or Mr.), feel free to forgo them in favor of this more modern way to address wedding invitations: just using first and last names. Also note that Mx., a gender-neutral personal title, might be how a non-binary guest identifies. Keep this info in mind, but always double-check every attendee’s preferred personal titles beforehand, if you plan on incorporating them into your wedding invitations.
Inner envelopes are more informal, giving you the option to leave out one or two elements of the formal name format of the outer envelope. Go with your gut here—if using personal titles and last names together feels right, that works. If you’re going for casual vibes and would like to use first names only, you have our blessing.
| Name on the Invitation | Name on the Envelope | |
|---|---|---|
| Married couple where both are well known | Mr and Mrs John Ley | [Mr and] Mrs John Ley (envelope) |
| Married couple with invited children | Mr and Mrs John Ley, Joanna and Suzanna | [Mr and] Mrs John Ley |
| Married couple where only the husband is known well | Mr and Mrs John Ley | Mr John Ley |
| A medical doctor | Dr and Mrs John Ley | [Dr and] Mrs John Ley |
| Single man | Mr John Ley | Mr John Ley |
| Single woman | Miss Josephine Ley | Miss Josephine Ley |
| Non-binary | Mx Kitty Marshall | Mx Kitty Marshall |
| Widowed woman | Mrs John Ley | Mrs John Ley |
| Divorced woman | Mrs Julie Hart | Mrs Julie Hart |
| Unmarried couple | Miss Martha Williams and Mr Stephen Cox | Miss Martha Williams and Mr Stephen Cox |
| Same sex couple | Mr Edward Haysom and Mr Matt Beauchamp | Mr Edward Haysom and Mr Matt Beauchamp |
| Single woman and guest where the guest is not known well | Miss Josephine Ley and Mr Carl Patten | Miss Josephine Ley |
| Church of England vicar where the spouse is not known well | The Reverend and Mrs Stuart Hicks | The Reverend Stuart Hicks |
The Request Line: Please Come!
The Request Line: Please Come!
“the pleasure of your company”
“at the marriage of their children”
“would love for you to join them”
“invite you to celebrate with them”
“honour of your presence”
The Names of Bride and Groom
If there names haven’t been included in the host line, they should still take center stage a few lines down. Traditionally the name of the bride always precedes the groom’s name. Formal invitations issued by the bride’s parents refer to her by her first and middle names, the groom by his full name and title; if the couple is hosting by themselves, their titles are optional.
For a same-sex marriage, you can choose to go in alphabetical order or choose what sounds better. Whether it’s “Tasmin and Sonya” or “Sonya and Tasmin,” it’s going to be lovely either way.
The Date and Time
For formal weddings, everything is written out in full (no numerals). The year is optional (the assumption being your wedding is on the nearest such date). Time of day is spelled out using “o’clock” or “half after five o’clock.” The use of a.m. or p.m. is optional. For casual weddings, numerals are fine.
The Location
The street address of a venue is not usually needed, unless omitting it would lead to confusion or your wedding is taking place at the host’s home. The city and county should be written out in full in either case.
Reception Information
Very formal invitations include this information on a separate card. Otherwise, it can be printed on the wedding invitation itself if there is room; if the ceremony and reception are held in the same location, you may print “and afterward at the reception” or “reception immediately following.” When the reception is elsewhere, the location goes on a different line. Include the time if the wedding reception is not immediately following the ceremony.
Dress Code
Wedding invitation etiquette dictates that the dress code, if it’s to be included on the invitation, is is the lower right hand corner of the invitation. If you don’t include a note on attire, the invitation will indicate the dress code. For example, if the invitation is very fancy, guests will likely anticipating a formal, black-tie affair, or conversely, if the invitation on the simpler side, that indicates a more casual dress code.
Separate RSVP Card
Most couples choose to include a separate response card for guests to fill out and return in the mail. You also have the option of having people RSVP via your wedding website. If that’s the case, include the website address on a separate card, just as you would with an RSVP card, and indicate that guests can let you know if they can come directly on the site.